Listen to What You Truly Want
I love to help job seekers reclaim their sense of purpose and move into fulfilling jobs. I’ve done this myself, and I want to share what I’ve learned with you. Please feel free to reach out to me at ruth@confidentcareersearch.com if you have a question about your job search or feel a mismatch with what you’re doing now. Trust me: Career happiness is possible. Want to chat? Book time with me.
Listen.
Right now, sit still (maybe close your eyes) and listen to what is going on around you.
What do you hear? Is it urban traffic? Birds? Is someone mowing a lawn?
After a few minutes, shift your attention to yourself. Sense your feet, your legs, your torso, your neck—what sensations are surfacing? Aches and pains? Perhaps you can feel your stomach rumbling. Some of you might have a deep feeling of relaxation, just enjoying the relative silence, and some of you might sense an anxious feeling that you had not been aware of before.
Notice these sensations, then consider if any action might be needed. Should you get up and move around to alleviate stiffness? Would a few deep breaths help your anxiety fade? Is there something in your life that you need to examine more closely?
It’s astonishing how out of touch we can be with our bodies. We don’t hear what’s happening around us and we don’t “hear” what’s happening within us. It’s not surprising, given how “plugged in” most of us are all the time. I rarely see anyone walking along without earbuds or enjoying coffee in a café without peering at their phone. One of my friends always has the TV on during our phone calls, and it can make focus difficult.
I don’t believe that this constant need for stimulus is a good thing. A consequence is that we are distracted from important functions, and this includes recognizing what we truly want and need.
I see this frequently with the clients I serve who want to change their working lives. They want new jobs, perhaps in different industries, so they can feel happier and more at peace. Many of them want to course-correct their earlier life decisions. But they realize that this work requires more than simply matching demonstrated to required skills for open roles. Effective shifts require more than repeating the past in a different context. Effective, lasting change comes from the ability to know yourself.
The work we do centers on listening. We begin by acknowledging the satisfying and miserable times they have spent at work. We then compare these experiences to their natural gifts and the values most important to them. We also do some deeper inner reflection involving their feelings about their choices and chosen activities.
The goal is to leverage that inner detection system that can help them tap their deepest selves and direct their decisions, so they can move past the persistent thoughts about what they “should do” and toward what they internally are telling themselves they prefer to do.
It’s challenging. Most of us live, as meditation teacher Reginald Ray describes, "from the neck up." We live primarily in our thoughts, and this ignorance of the signals from our physical selves is a cause of physical and emotional discomfort, a sense of alienation, and a lack of fulfillment.
But you can change this.